Five week update

I am up early on Sunday morning because it's the only quiet time of the day. But I'm not pumping. . . :)
About four days ago I decided to stop pumping as much to see if Yonah could effectively remove the milk himself if there was more of it in my breasts. I had to put a lot of faith in this because if he couldn't get it all out and I didn't know, my supply could dip and that can be a struggle to get it to come back. I think the first day I tried was Wednesday, and I pumped after a couple feedings, when he'd finally gone to sleep. I was still worried and stressed that he had a restriction in his mouth that would make this hard or impossible. We were already over the hump of being comfortable while nursing (mostly, except when there is a lot of milk (like at night time), sometimes he gets a shallow latch). I had already had a couple times where he latched on and then drank through the let down (and then popped off or fell asleep), so I thought that I would keep trying.

So the first day I still pumped once at night, but then things continued to get better. On Thursday, I decided to set up an appointment with the lactation consultant at WIC. We'd been in phone contact since Yonah was born, and she had sent me a supplemental nursing system in the mail (bless her!) because she wasn't going to be in Harrisonburg for another week. I had much trouble with the SNS, mainly because Yonah would not take the tube in when he latched on, so it was messy and frustrating, so I brought it along, and my hungry baby, and we went to work. She had some alternative taping ideas (which were so helpful! If you have a big areola, don't follow the diagram in the book! The baby can handle the tape being right up to their mouth).

She checked his mouth and watched him latch and remove milk and said it looked really good. He was a little fussy in the middle of feeding, which neither of us knew why (one could speculate it was gas). Because I had been supplementing a little with WAPF formula, she recommended a supplement, and I ordered goat's rue off of Mountain Rose Herbs when I came home (otherwise I'm paying $40 for a tincture).

It was then I realized that I needed to stop diagnosing something that I could work through. At the beginning of breastfeeding Yonah, it was really hard, and if we hadn't been stubborn and pumped and continued to put him to the breast, we might not have gotten this far. I was really frustrated when I had to give him a bottle and keep giving him a bottle, but he was getting what he needed and I was thankful for that. Because of all the information on the internet, I have been aware of tongue ties and lip ties and their effects long term on people's mouths and the issues of tooth decay and speech issues. But I was also aware of the hell that moms went through after getting their children's frenulums clipped and then having to stretch them and some reattaching and then going through all of it again. I have decided to make myself not think of it as an issue or problem. I have decided to not worry about it. (If we get to two and he has other issues like speech or tooth issues, then we will reevaluate.)

I wonder if we would have been able to get Naisa to latch and worked through it if I had not had flat nipples, or if we had had support after I started pumping to heal my nipples.

I am thankful that we were able to overcome without anything but patience and persistence. I am thankful that things got better. I prayed and prayed for this during this pregnancy because I wanted it so bad. I didn't want to have to pump for a year again. I wanted more than two years between this baby and the next.

We are still learning. There is a learning curve to this, for sure, and part of it is that he is still so small, Naisa is loud, distracting, and needy, and that contributes to his distracted nursing. I am still learning some of his cues and we are still learning different ways to nurse. I would love to perfect side lying nursing so that I can rest while nursing at night, but right now he seems to still do best when I can direct what he is doing (with a bit of light) and in the cross cradle position.

I am so glad I took the leap of faith to let him try, and not trying to micro manage ounces and times pumping. I'm glad I have that experience of pumping under my belt, but I am more than happy to hang up the horns except for the occasional time (date night!).

He's eleven pounds now.