It’s important to be aware. To be passionate, to be driven, and motivated by injustices in the world and to reach the point where you can tell the world because you understand that it needs to be known. That it needs to be something that people are passionate about, and it needs to be something people are motivated by, because it is an injustice in the world.
Part of passion is the empathy that goes along with acknowledging oppression. I take on the pain that other people feel, can sense the frustration in the air when the oppression continues, when people misunderstand what’s really going on. I hate seeing conflict, seeing people disagree, but what I hate more is not seeing the truth bared at the end of the day. This happens when people don’t accept others for who and what they are, but instead choose to stereotype, discriminate, and hate. Other parts of oppression, though, I have experienced, as a woman.
On Monday night, there was a presentation of a video about Hip Hop culture. Afterward, at the discussion, two opinions were created: one in the discussion and the other in my own mind. The African American students who attended the event wanted us to know that the video displayed a stereotype of their culture; this wasn’t who they all were. During the video presentation the idea that stuck out to me the most was the oppression and the issues within our culture. These are caused by patriarchy: men being the leaders in relationship and being dominant over women. This idea is portrayed in the media displaying that women are for men’s sexual pleasures, they have little brain, little clothes, and no voice, other than to voice sexual desires.
I understand that not all African American men carry themselves standing on pedestals of dominating violence, homophobia, and objectifying women. I have reached the point through my life experience of diversity, through my cross cultural in DC and a summer in Queens, that I cannot stereotype anyone by the standards that the media portrays. Certainly, there are men of all races and ethnicities that fulfill that patriarchal role, but there are also quality, deep, men who love the beauty of person and personality.
I left the discussion, however, with a feeling of oppression upon my gut. I walked away disgusted, feeling like my body was oppressing me. Once, when I was walking home from the metro in Washington D.C., I was stopped by a man in a car, in broad daylight, who got out of his car and asked me if I had a boyfriend. I responded with a ‘yes,’ but proceeded to talk to him until he let me on my way. He did not touch or harm me, but I have never felt more confused or filled with fear in my life. I try to carry myself with confidence, to be quick to conversation, but I’m also quick to hide my fear, and my lack of comfort. If the man who got out of his car to ask me that question thought he was complimenting me, or would be able to convince me that he was a worthy gentlemen of choice for a relationship, he was quite confused. This man, though displaying his interest through conversation, only pulled over because he thought I was beautiful, and objectified me.
My frustration continues when I see people who only flirt with others because they are women, or because they fit the standards of beauty in society. This, though building some sort of shallow relationship with someone, still banks off of outward beauty and sexuality. It seems that flirts don’t genuinely like anyone, they just live for attention, and for the self-esteem boost when people reciprocate a response of “I think you’re hot, too.”
Oppression, frustration, and anger resonated in me as I left. What could I do? The only way to stop the objectification of women is to change the structure of our media influences. This means in advertising, we have to stop making people feel bad about themselves enough to buy something. We have to stop setting the standard of women’s idealized body weight at 13-18% underweight. We have to stop sexualizing everything, making every advertisement about thin women, sex, or both. It’s become all about comparing ourselves to others, as if at the genetic level, we all fit the same stereotype.
Awareness is the first part of making a change. I am passionate and driven enough to want to make others aware the oppression of women in society, even if it’s only through my own frustrations and anger. I want people to have awareness of their own actions, and what their influences are. Even if they don’t ‘fit a stereotype’, what are their tendencies? Look! Go outside into the beautiful world, look at human beings and see human beings, with beautiful intelligence and beautiful ideas, not just a beautiful face.
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