No Longer Suffering Alone

Suffering is a part of humanity. It can be drawn from the very beginning, in Genesis, when the fruit was bitten. Sin was born, pain created, and toiling planted into the working of the soil, the earth, and everything in it. As we have been born into this world that has sin and suffering, we are also bound to suffer.
Because of this, suffering should be normal. People are dying constantly, incurable diseases coming upon people, accidents happen, and life changes. It should be accepted that pain will come along in our lives. Life’s emotions are a bit of a roller coaster, but in knowing this, there is always a mountain after a valley--a positive on the other end. We will live through it!
Somewhere along the way, this Western society seduced us to conform to individuality. This means that we care about ourselves, what others think of us, and have no need to depend upon them. We are who we are, and we don’t need anybody’s help. This means that when we suffer, we are in constant thought of what other people would think of us. If we are crying, or depressed, or seem “lonely,” we are in a state of vulnerability, and our society is uncomfortable with genuine vulnerability. Instead, we put on masks. We avoid pain. We avoid conversations about pain. We hold our pain in.
This idea of perpetual happiness is fictitious. There is not one person in this earth who has lived a life of pure happiness. What kind of a life would that be, to only see the high side, to be constantly floating? This life would be out of touch with reality. Because there would be no up or down, life would be monotonous and boring.
My point is this: why should we have to hold in our pain, keep our shamed secrets within our hearts until we die, because we must hold to these standards that have rooted their way into our souls? God created humans for relationship, and within that relationship, he calls us to bind together, so that “if one falls, the other can help them up” (Ecclesiastes 4:10). God wants us to glean off of our friends, our brothers and sisters in Christ, because they will build us back up when we are suffering, and be our support when we cannot go on anymore. God wants us to open up about our past pains and sufferings—the ones that have lain dormant for so long, but still influence everything we do. God wants us to talk about it.
In my experience, pain stays with me until let others cross the boundary of comfort and enter into the vulnerable deep within me. It is so hard to let others do that, to let people comfort me, because I’ve been framed by the standard that “I can do it myself, I can get better myself” and have been self-medicating through writing lyrics and songs for so long. But God has helped me realize that writing music to an ambiguous crowd can only heal so much.
Confiding in someone helped me remove the fear of rejection, the fear that everyone else is individualistic and doesn’t care. I always knew in the back of my mind that people do care, they can empathize, and they can love unconditionally, but because of the pain I’ve experienced, I only thought I could depend upon myself. I’ve learned otherwise, but it’s been a long process getting there.
In this life, when you are suffering, remember that though you are “in the valley of the shadow of death,” (Psalm 23:4) you aren’t alone. God is with you. Listen to that whispering voice. It’s okay to open your mouth and let your words come out, no matter how hard it is to speak.